Welcome back to Rebuilding Trust With Your Body, I’m Katy Harvey your host. Today on the show we are going to dig into your relationship with exercise, particularly if you have a block against doing it.
Most of us know that exercise is, generally speaking, good for us. It helps strengthen your muscles and bones, it improves cardiovascular and lung health, it can improve your immunity and help you get better sleep. It can even improve your digestion, your ability to focus and your mood.
We don’t really need to be convinced WHY we would benefit from moving our bodies.
Yet, for so many of you, there is a block in your mind that is preventing you from doing it. You want to do it (or at the very least you want to want to do it), and maybe sometimes you go on kicks where you start going to the gym again, or you sign up with a personal trainer, or you start taking bootcamp classes or yoga…but then it fizzles, and you’re beating yourself up for not sticking with it.
You feel frustrated, discouraged, and like a failure.
That’s what we’re going to work through here in this episode today.
Before we dive into our main topic for today, you know what time it is…We’ve got some Wellness Woo to talk about.
Wellness Woo is the stuff that diet and wellness culture tells us we should do in the name of health, but it’s really based on pseudoscience, exaggerated claims, or just nonsense.
Today’s Wellness Woo is – you might have guessed it from the title of the episode – The 10k steps per day myth
- My first introduction to this concept was when I was in college and we were doing one of those walk a thons for the ACS
- We were given pedometers and told how we should all be getting 10k steps per day
Where did this 10k steps per day thing come from?
You might be surprised to hear it doesn’t come from actual science about how much movement we need each day.
It’s one of those things that sounds so precise that most of us assume that it must be a research-backed number. Like why else would they specifically say 10k steps per day?
You want to know where this actually originated from? A marketing campaign.
It’s a completely made up number. It originated back around the time of the 1964 Tokyo Olympics when a Japanese company used it in a marketing campaign for the pedometers they were selling.
Is walking generally good for us? Sure. But what’s the evidence that you need 10k steps in order to achieve some type of health outcome? There is none.
So how many steps, or how much movement do we need in order to be healthy?
That depends on how we are defining health, and what’s going on with YOUR body.
There is such thing as too much exercise. And if you have a relationship with exercise or your step count where you’re marching around your living room just to hit a certain number on your smart watch or fit bit, then I would argue that the step thing might not actually be that healthy for you.
Or if you’re OBSESSED with using one of those walking pads all day long while you work, that might not actually be health-promoting for you – because when it comes to health we also have to factor in your relationship with movement.
For some people, what might make them healthier is to give themselves permission to NOT exercise, or to rest, or to put away their walking pad or fit bit.
For other people, having a step goal or using a walking pad can be really helpful.
It’s all about context and where you’re coming from.
When it comes to steps, there was a study published out of the University of Massachusetts department of kinesiology, where they followed over 2000 middle aged adults between 2005 and 2016. So that’s a decent amount of data. And what they looked at was their walking habits and how many steps they were averaging per day, and then they correlated it with their risk of health conditions and death.
What it showed was that it’s actually around the 5-7k per day step mark that we see a marked difference in risk of death from all causes compared to people who barely walk at all. So that’s an important distinction here, and what we’re saying is that if you’re hardly doing any movement, walking is a GREAT way to improve your health.
What’s also interesting is that the study showed that above and beyond 7k steps per day there weren’t necessarily added health benefits.
Am I suggesting that you take your 10k steps per day goal or obsession and change it to 5k or 7k? No. I don’t think that any type of obsession with exercise is healthy.
But what I am suggesting here is that a lower dose of exercise than you realize has health benefits, and we need to be more skeptical and scrutinize these blanket statements that we hear about what we “should” be doing for our health.
One other fun fact here, is that studies also show that walking for just 5-10 minutes after a meal can improve blood sugar for people with insulin resistance or diabetes. So again, a pretty small dose, especially right after a meal, can make a meaningful impact on health in this specific situation.
We have to keep in mind that health goals need to be considered in the context of your body. Perhaps for you, you’d be better off doing something like swimming if you have joint issues, or strength training if you are in perimenopause or you’re postmenopausal.
To wrap up with our wellness woo here, yes walking is a wonderful thing. But your 10k step goal is woo and it’s not rooted in health science.
If you have an example of Wellness Woo that you want to share, send it to me at rebuildingtrustwithyourbody@gmail.com.
Ok, that’s enough of that. Moving on to today’s main topic…How to overcome your block against exercise.
Creating Your Exercise Timeline
If you have a block against exercise, or you find yourself constantly starting and stopping it and you’re frustrated with yourself that you’re not sticking with it, here’s where I want to start this discussion:
Let’s get curious about your history with exercise. I want you to actually get out a piece of paper and do a timeline that goes all the way back to your childhood.
- When you were a little kid, what did you like to do? Were you the kid who was always playing outside, riding their bike, jumping rope, hula hooping, playing catch, doing Skip It (my fellow 90’s kids know what I’m talking about). Or were you the kid who wanted to do art, play video games, play inside with your toys, read books? Here’s the thing – some kids are more wired to be active and running around than others.
- What messages did you receive about movement as a young kid? Was your family active? Did your parents exercise? What were their attitudes about it?
- As you got a little older, did you do any sports, or dance? If so, how did you feel about them? Did you like sports and want to do it, or were you put in sports by your parents? What was your favorite sport?
- What was gym class like for you as a kid?
- Did you play sports in middle school or high school? What was your activity level like then?
- What did exercise look like for you when you first moved out of your house – whether it was going off to college, or getting your own place for the first time, or getting married or moving in with your partner? When you were first on your own in the world, did you exercise or move your body in any particular way?
- What has exercise looked like throughout adulthood? What have you done? What have you enjoyed? What did you dislike?
- Does exercise tend to coincide with dieting for you? What leads to go on an exercise kick, and what causes you to quit or fizzle with it?
The key to all of these questions is to genuinely be curious, and not judge yourself. We just want to gather some data and an understanding of your relationship with exercise based on this timeline of what it has been like throughout your life.
Figuring Out Your WHY
When it comes to exercise now in your life, let’s define your “why.” If you don’t have a strong why, then it’s hard to stick with it long-term.
First I have a question for you…and I want you to be deeply honest with yourself. No judgment, no shame, and you’re not bad/wrong for thinking this way if you are. Is your “why” with exercise to burn calories, lose weight, and/or to aesthetically make your body look a certain way?
You might be feeling either 1) busted and called out, or 2) you’re thinking, “Duh, why else would someone exercise? Isn’t that the point.”
I’m here to tell you that if your “why” for exercising is mostly about calories, weight and the way you look – that’s not a very good why. You are much less likely to stick with it long-term, and it’s probably perpetuating this on/off relationship with exercise.
The cold, hard truth (because I love you), is that exercise doesn’t actually burn as many calories as you probably think it does, and it’s really not very effective at producing weight loss. So if that’s your goal you’re going to be chasing your tail.
Fixating on burning calories and losing weight is also a counter-productive goal in general, because it keeps us stuck in that diet mentality and the rollercoaster ride of ups and downs with your eating, your exercise and your weight…which it turns out is not good for your body or your health.
We know that exercise offers a TON of genuine health benefits, so perhaps you want to focus on those. Something most people don’t realize is that being physically active is more strongly correlated with health and longevity than your weight is.
Translation = finding ways to stay active throughout your life is more important for your health than your weight. Exercise is good for you, regardless of your weight.
(My caveat that I cannot emphasize enough is that there is also such thing as too much exercise, so what I’m NOT saying here is that “more is better” and that you need to become obsessed with exercising as much as possible to be healthy. Remember what we talked about in the Wellness Woo segment where there is a tipping point at which you’re not getting more benefits from doing more exercise.)
So let’s focus on finding your why, and making it NOT about calories and your weight.
You might choose to make it about health, or perhaps you want to explore what “joyful movement” could look like in your life, or maybe your “why” is that you want to be able to keep up with your kids or grandkids, or you want to be mobile enough to travel and go site seeing on your European vacation. Maybe the exercise itself isn’t “joyful” for you per se, but the way it helps your body function better and ultimately feel better is what brings you joy – because it makes your LIFE better.
It could also be a way to increase social connection. Let’s say you start going to a yoga class, or a strength class at the gym, and even if you don’t become BFFs with the other people in class, you develop that sense of connection and camaraderie with them, and you get to know each other a little bit. There’s value in having this type of community where you know some friendly faces, and it gets you out into the world. (Remember that we were all beginners at one time, so even if it’s awkward to walk into a new class, once you go a few times and you have figured out how it works, it will feel so much easier to go.)
Shake Things Up
If you have a block against exercise, maybe it’s time to shake things up. Perhaps your block is that you are embarrassed at how much you sweat, or that you’re uncoordinated and you feel awkward at the gym or in a class, or that you have a lot of pain and difficulty with your mobility.
All of these things can hold us back from even giving ourselves the chance to try something, especially something new.
Oftentimes, we return to exercises that we’ve done in the past, because it’s what’s familiar. But what might also be familiar is the pattern of starting and stopping.
Therefore, there could be value in trying something you’ve never tried before, and starting with a clean slate. Then you can’t compare your current ability to your ability in the past.
If you’ve never tried pilates, sign up for a class. Most places offer a free class.
If you’ve never done weight lifting, let the trainer on staff at the gym show you how to use the machines, or take one of the strength classes they offer.
If you’ve never done a 5k, see if you can find a friend or family member to sign up to walk one with you. Maybe you could do a Turkey Trot this year or a Christmas themed 5k. Those tend to be really lighthearted and fun, and lots of people walk them.
Maybe you have a dog, and you could walk loops around the perimeter of the dog park while your dog runs around, or you could go on some walks around your neighborhood with your dog.
Dancing in your living room can be fun. There are all sorts of YouTube videos for this. Or chair exercises, or yoga videos (a lot of people like Yoga With Adrienne on YouTube).
Be open to trying something NEW, something that sounds a little bit fun or intriguing to you. Let yourself be a beginner. Let’s normalize adults trying new things.
Be Prepared For Some Discomfort
Realistically, when you experiment with movement, you might have some continued resistance to it at first. Even people who enjoy exercise have to push themselves to do it sometimes.
If you wait around to only do it on the days that you “intuitively” feel like it, you will most likely rarely want to do it.
It’s GREAT when you can have joyful movement, and exercise that you look forward to doing.
But there will most likely be some times that you have to give yourself that loving nudge of fierce self-compassion where you tell yourself that you are going to do your workout, even though you don’t feel like it, because it’s important to you (this is where you remember your “why”).
OF COURSE there will be days that you need to give yourself permission to skip or to rest. Part of making peace with movement is learning to tell the difference between not doing it because you don’t want to, vs not doing it because your body is needing the rest that day.
If historically you’ve had this block against moving, you might err on the side of pushing yourself to do it even when you don’t want to, and reassure yourself that if you get started and you’re truly not feeling it, you have full permission to stop after 5 or 10 minutes.
A lot of times once we get going we’re fine.
There’s also some physical and mental discomfort you may have to practice tolerating when you’re getting into a routine of being more active. At first, when our bodies aren’t used to something, it’s often going to feel hard. You might get sweaty and winded really quickly. You might feel sore afterwards. Your brain might be telling you to run away from this.
Now, again, OF COURSE you need to listen to your body and not push yourself harder than is safe. But you might have to practice reassuring your brain that a little bit of discomfort is normal, expected, and doesn’t mean that your body can’t handle it, or that you’re too out of shape, or that you’re a loser, or that you should give up.
If you stick with it and stay consistent, the exercise itself will start to feel easier, and you’ll most likely start to feel better while you’re doing it, and afterwards.
Our bodies are made to move, and motion is like lotion for our joints.
So play around with some different ways of moving, and give yourself permission to start slow, and work through the uncomfortable parts – with compassion towards yourself. We don’t want to turn this into a shaming, punishing, or militant type of thing.
Wrapping Up
Let’s recap what we covered:
- Your exercise timeline
- What’s your WHY
- Shake things up and explore different types of movement
- Working through discomfort
I hope that this gave you some new things to consider with exercise, and some deeper insights into your relationship with it. The key here is to stay curious, and to think of this as an experiment to see what happens if you dig deeper on the emotional side of things, and try doing things differently on the practical side of things.
Now, it’s also worth noting that our relationship with exercise is also intertwined with our relationship with food. That’s largely in part due to how diet culture has lumped together diet and exercise, so exercise often ends up going hand-in-hand with dieting. That’s an association that we are trying to break here.
If you want some more clarity, guidance and resources to help you with where you’re at on your journey towards freedom with food AND exercise, go check out my free quiz. It’s called Discover Your Unique Path to Food Freedom, and all you have to do is answer a few questions (it will take you about 2 minutes), and based on your answers I’ll send you some free resources, and guidance on what elements of intuitive eating would be most helpful for you to focus on at this stage of your journey. You can DM me the word QUIZ or head over to nondietacademy.com/quiz to take the free quiz.
For most people, the challenges in their relationship with exercise are something that we also need to address on the journey towards healing your relationship with food, and let’s not forget that principle 9 of intuitive eating is about joyful movement.
So take the quiz, it’s going to help you both with food AND with the exercise piece of things, and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. I’m cheering you on always.
In case nobody has told you today – you are worthy just as you are. We’ll talk again soon.
Sources:
- The 10,000 steps a day challenge was actually a marketing ploy. Here’s how many steps you really need
- Steps per Day and All-Cause Mortality in Middle-aged Adults in the Coronary Artery Risk Development in Young Adults Study
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