As a parent, there might come a time when your child says, “I feel fat,” or is called fat by kids at school or someone in their life. These moments can be challenging, and knowing how to respond thoughtfully and supportively is crucial. Whether you have small kids at home, teenagers, or even adult children, understanding the do’s and don’ts of these conversations is something we can all learn.

In a recent podcast episode, I had the pleasure of speaking with Erin Kerns Vazquez, who shared her journey from dieting since the age of 10 to wholeheartedly embracing body acceptance and intuitive eating. Erin’s story is powerful and enlightening, providing invaluable insights into fostering a healthy body image for ourselves and the children in our lives.

Erin’s Journey: From Dieting to Body Acceptance

Erin was bullied about her weight as a kid, and her experiences shaped her views on body image. In response to her childhood struggles, she wrote a children’s book that delivers the messages she needed to hear when she was young. These messages focus on body acceptance and self-love, challenging the harmful narratives often imposed by society and diet culture.

Erin recalls the well-intentioned but misguided attempts by adults in her life to help her “get healthier” by losing weight. These efforts, meant to boost her self-esteem and silence the bullies, often missed the mark and reinforced negative body image messages instead.

Healing Body Image and Unpacking Childhood Messages

One of the key takeaways from my conversation with Erin is the importance of healing our own body image. Many of us carry the weight of negative messages received during childhood, perpetuated by diet culture and societal expectations. By unpacking these messages, we can begin to heal and foster a healthier relationship with our bodies.

Fostering a Healthy Body Image for Your Children

Here are some essential tips for supporting your children in developing a healthy body image:

Be Mindful of Your Own Language: How you talk about your body in front of your children significantly impacts how they perceive their bodies. Strive to speak positively and neutrally about your body and avoid negative self-talk.

Promote Body Neutrality: A healthy body image doesn’t necessarily mean being body-positive all the time. It’s about having peace and neutrality with your body, even on days when you might wish it were different. Encourage your children to appreciate what their bodies can do rather than focusing on appearance.

Respond Thoughtfully: If your child says, “I feel fat,” respond with empathy and reassurance. Avoid dismissing their feelings or suggesting weight loss as a solution. Instead, focus on their emotions and offer support. You might say, “I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. Your body is just one part of who you are, and it doesn’t define your worth.”

Challenge Negative Messages: Help your children recognize and challenge the negative messages they receive about their bodies from media, peers, or even well-meaning adults. Teach them to question these messages and develop a critical perspective.

Encourage Healthy Habits for the Right Reasons: Promote healthy eating and physical activity for the sake of overall well-being, not for weight control. Emphasize the importance of nourishing the body and staying active for energy, strength, and mental health.

Key Takeaways

• Beliefs About Our Bodies Start Young: The way we see our parents talking about their own bodies impacts how we feel about our own bodies, even now as adults.

• Healthy Body Image Means Peace and Neutrality: A “healthy body image” doesn’t necessarily mean body positivity. It means having peace and neutrality with your body, even on days you might wish it were different.

• Navigating Tricky Conversations: Be clear and confident in navigating conversations about body image with your kids. Support them in dealing with body image issues in a weight-obsessed world by promoting empathy, understanding, and healthy habits.

By fostering a positive environment and promoting a healthy body image, you can help your children develop confidence and self-acceptance that will last a lifetime. Remember, the way you talk about and treat your own body sets a powerful example for your children to follow.

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Search for Episode 129: How to Increase Your Odds of Binge Eating and Gaining Weight

Looking for more support on your journey to food freedom and body acceptance?

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• Check out my course, Non-Diet Academy